A Jester in the King's Court

This is going to be the first entry into Sam’s Blog….or the Sblog….which wounds a bit like a Russian prison….

…anyway…I did not really have any type of inspiration at all…so I asked the person that convinced me to wade deep into the realm of blogging what I should write on….and Shanda gave me my topic. That’s right…Shanda suggested this. You cannot blame me for what is about to transpire…the blood is on Shanda Cogner’s hands.

She said: Ceiling Fans.

This is an awful topic to blog on. And let’s be serious…first impressions are important. So, I’m going to do the logical thing…and write this blog as though it were a script from a Rob Bell Nooma video named Ceiling Fan.

:::Camera opens to the interior of a Home Depot. The camera pans to the “Ceiling Illumination” section and centers on a man with a semi-faux hawk, a sweater that is made to resemble something from he 1970’s and glasses thick enough to hide Nichole Richie::

Voice in the background: Dude….what are you doing, this is a Nooma video

:::The camera pans slightly to the left so the man in the center is slightly off center:::

Voice in the background: That’s better

:::The man in the frame starts talking with a voice that sounds like a mixture of Jack Bauer, a guy with a hernia and Charlie from Lost 4 days into his heroine withdrawals:::

Man: Wind. It’s a powerful force. This one time…as a kid…I remember my Dad took me to fly a kite. It was…like this glimmer into another world….like, this dimension where the sky and Earth were friends and wanted to have tea together. My Dad and I made the kite drive and loop…but then the wind stopped. And when it did…that kite fell to the ground. I was traumatized. As a child…this amazing experience…ended…because there was no wind.

It made me think about the Christian life…because it was so closely related to it….you and I are like kites…and we’re trying to live this life…but we just fall…because there’s no wind. No power.

:::Man sits lightly on the edge of some fan boxes, put his hand to his mouth and gives the camera (which is now zoomed in n him…while still off centered) a look that either means he wants to marry the camera, or is going to tell it it has cancer and says::

Man: In the Bible…it talks about the Holy Spirit…that word Spirit…in both Greek and Hebrew…it also means wind. Like…that’s what life is about…being the kite that the Holy Wind can move and position…and as that kite…our job is to sit there and dance in the sky as we let this…this force move us around.

But God isn’t like a…a wind in a prairie that can just go away…He’s more constant. He’s like a ceiling fan. No matter what happens…your ceiling fan is there….just…lavishing you with wind from above.

:::The camera zooms out and you can see people walking around the guy…but its been filmed in that super artsy way so they have trail behind them which makes them look super fast and makes him look super alone::

Man: We need to install Ceiling Fans in everyone’s hearts…and just let the power of God breeze through us

:::Fade to black::

Ok, that was special. I think we’ve learned a few things:
1) When I type a Rob Bell script I feel dirty
2) Ceiling Fans are a crappy topic
3) And I’ve just ensured my blog will have 0 readers:]

Thank you and goodnight!!!